Hearing Aids: Why I’ll Never Wear One

I’m deaf, well, nearly deaf. A year of mortar fire in Vietnam, years of loud rock music and bringing up three crazy boys have taken their toll on my ears.

Most every family has somebody who drives them crazy by saying “Huh?” and “Whadja say?” all the time. Sooner or later they will harangue this person into getting their ears checked with the express purpose of getting a hearing aid. My family was no different and I finally buckled and saw an audiologist. After reading some of the muama enence reviews, I made this stark decision. 

I have to say I found out some very interesting things. First, I had a hearing loss at most tone levels with at significant level at the high pitches. This is known as “high frequency hearing loss”. Additionally, though, I found out some fascinating things about how we function when we don’t hear so well.

It turns out that when we talk with those we are close to such as family members that live under the same roof, we get used to the same topics coming up over and over again. As a result we actually “fill in the blanks” when it comes to words we don’t hear clearly; we assume certain things are being said and most of the time we are right. It also means that in many situations we don’t really pay that much attention. We minimize our listening effort in order to think about what we are going to say next.

In another venue, when people are talking and we really can’t make out the words through sound, we read lips; so the audiologist said. I didn’t believe her because I didn’t remember consciously reading lips. I had my wife mouth a short sentence and I couldn’t believe it; I understood it!

I was fascinated by the new information and was ready to go on with my life but, my family had other ideas. They wanted me to get bilateral (both sides) hearing aids. I priced them and the ones that didn’t make me look like an idiot were priced at $4,500 each; $4,500…each! That was the initial reason I decided against ever wearing hearing aids.

My wife, claiming that was there no way that there wasn’t an option lower than $4,500 dragged me out to several stores. She found a pair of hearing aids for $1,200. I’m not kidding you, they weighed about ten pounds each and I had to wear a battery on my back that looked like scuba gear; that’s the second reason I won’t ever get a hearing aid, I refuse to look goofier than I already do.

However, there is an overriding reason that a hearing aid is not a part of my future. We have two dogs. These dogs occasionally whine. I have high frequency loss so I can’t hear them. When I go into a noisy restaurant, it just sounds like a low hum, not a lot of obnoxious people talking. Why would I pay money to add irritating sounds to my life?

I have learned the fine art of smiling and nodding my head about every 20 seconds and frankly, people don’t want to hear me talk anyway.

Yes, I need a hearing aid. I’ll never get one because they’re too expensive; they look too stupid and I don’t want to hear most of the noises I’m missing anyway.

My hearing loss bothers other people; it doesn’t bother me. I know I should put others first, especially my family…nah.

Brian Singleton a retired news editor and tech enthusiast. He shares a deep love for science and technology and wishes to connect with others through this his content.

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